This will be a
series of
various subjects
dealing with
personal
problems in
their search for
God and a better
way of life.
Below is a list
of subjects
which we will be
cover over the
next few months.
Disappointment is one of the frustrating
problems each of us must face. Often I hear
people say, "He disappointed me so much." Or
have you ever said to someone, "I'M so
disappointed in you?" Or even more pointed,
"God I'm disappointed." Maybe you like so
many just thought it to yourself without mentionig it to any one for fear of the
disappointment of not being understood.
If we are
to face life realistically, we will have to
grapple with the problem of disappointment.
It can't be ignored.
What happens
inside when we say we are disappointed? The
dictionary says it means "to be made unhappy
by the failure of one's hopes or
expectations." Disappointment then is the
sinking feeling we get when our plans blow
up in our faces.
From the
beginning of history men have had their
plans go wrong (even great of faith faced
this). The Bible doesn't present these men
of faith as cardboard characters with a
perpetual smile. On the contrary, Scripture
exposes the tender underside of their
failures while painting the picture of their
accomplishments. The pressing question is
not who experiences disappointment,
but why? What causes that sinking feeling
when things don't pan out?
Disappointment generally falls into two
distinct categories circumstances and
people.
When
things are not as expected, we become
disappointed. Abraham experienced this. One
day while he was living in the rich alluvial
basin around Ur of the Chaldess, God spoke
to. Abraham and directed him to leave
his home for a new land He would show
him. Instantly Abraham obeyed, taking his
herds ...and immediate' family on
a thousand mile journey to this new land. I
am sure as he made that long journey on
foot, he developed expectation and high
hopes about his new promised land.
But the
Biblical record of his arrival tersely
states: "Now there was a famine in the land-
- -" (Genesis 12:10.)
No record
is given to Abraham's feelings but its
reasonable to assume he was disappointed.
As he sat in his tent he must have thought,
"I left the beauty of Ur, all my relatives,
walked a thousand miles, and what do I get
--- a land wasted by drought. This isn't
what I expected." (Does that sound about
like our nature?)
Disappointment also comes when plans fall
through. This frequently happens to parents.
Often from the time their child is still an
infant, many parents begin to plan the kind
of career their child will enter, where he
will go to school, and whom he will marry.
Disappointment comes when the child
announces he wants something different than
what his parents planned.
When
extensive plans for a vacation have to be
cancelled, we are disappointed. But the most
painful disappointment comes when. people
fail us.
Paul
experienced this kind of disappointment. He
arrived in Troas fully expecting to see
Titus (II Cor. 2:12-14), but Titus was
nowhere to be found. Titus failure to keep
the appointment caused Paul
disappointment.
Disappointment comes when we trust a person
to do something and he fails us. Moses
experienced such a disappointment. God
called him to deliver Israel from Egyptian
bondage, but Moses begged off. "God, you
know I'm not an eloquent speaker."
Graciously God designated AAron, his
brother, as his mouthpiece. After
deliverance was accomplished, Moses and
Aaron were in the wilderness with the nation
at Mt. Sinai. Moses then left the camp and
went up in the mount to receive instructions
from God concerning His laws. While there,
God told Moses to get back down the mountain
before He destroyed the people. Moses
hurried back to the camp and found it in an
uproar. The people had persuaded Aaron to
build a golden calf and thus instituted
idolatry. Imagine Moses' disappointment in
Aaron and the people of Israel.
Disappointment is part of life, and its
important to know 1-how to deal
with it. Failure to cope with disappointment
can be devastating.
The first
consequence of unresolved disappointment is
cynicism. A person in this state feels its
futile to rely on anybody; his confidence in
people is at such a low ebb he'd rather not
believe anything they say. "If I don't
expect anything from them, they can't
disappoint me."
Disappointment brings discouragement.
Constant failure to realize our plans or
expectations will cause us to lose
confidence and hope, and inability to
handle disappointment becomes a great tool
for Satan.
A little
story about Satan and His tools:
It was
advertised that the devil was going to put
his tools up for sale. On the date of sale
the tools were placed for public inspection,
each being marked with its sale price.
They were a
treacherous lot of implements -- Hatred,
Envy, Jealousy, Deceit, Lying, Pride and so
on, comprised the outfit. Laid apart from
the rest was a harmless-looking tool,
well-worn and priced very high.
"What is
the name of this tool?" asked one of the
purchasers pointing to it.
"That is
Discouragement," tersely replied the devil.
"Why have you priced it so high?"
“Because
it is more useful to me than the others. I
can pry open and get inside of a man's heart
with that, when I cannot get near him with
other tools. Once I get inside, I can make
him do what I choose. It is badly worn
because I use it on almost everyone, since
few people know it belongs to me.”
Disappointment will make us want to give up
in despair. "What's the use?" Nothing ever
works out for me. Everything always goes
wrong. I'm tired of getting my hopes up only
to be let down." We will eventually want to
crawl off in a corner and let the world go
by without attempting to be apart of it.
When
disappointment comes, the tendency is to
blame somebody else. The man behind bars
says, "I got a raw deal," The man whose
business fails says, "Its the banker's
fault." He wouldn't loan me more money. The
person passed over for promotion says "its
the boss' fault because he didn't recognize
my talents," and so on.
Blaming
others for our disappointment is an
admission that we have never learned to
handle one of the basic problems of life.
Failure to deal with disappointment leads to
cynicism, discouragement and despair.
The Bible
sets forth several principles that when
known and applied will keep
disappointments from being a problem to you.
(Not that disappointment won't come, but
they won't get you down -- you can take them
in stride.)
Three
basic principles are if we want to conquer
disappointment. First: Realize
God is in control of ALL
circumstance. God is sovereign Ruler over
the u in verse and cannot be overthrown.
Because He is in control of all
circumstance, the life of the believer
cannot be a series of freak accidents. It is
under the direction of the sovereign God,
and He makes no mistakes.
What is
disappointment to one may well be what makes
another happy. The rain at a picnic may make
a boy unhappy because it ruined the picnic;
on the other hand, it made the father happy
because he didn't want to go in the first
place. Likewise, rain may make the boy
happy because he doesn't have to mow the
lawn; it may make the father unhappy because
he wanted the lawn mowed. God is in control
of the circumstances that come our way and
He doesn't make a mistake.
God has a
definite plan for our lives -- the very best
possible. When we choose to adopt our
own plans rather than His, we can look for
disappointment. True happiness in the midst
of disappointment comes when we know the
failure of our plans is in God's control. We
have our ideas, but God has a better idea.
A keen
awareness that God is in control of
circumstances leads to the realization that
our disappointments are God's appointments.
This will help us beat the "grin and bear
it" approach to disappointments. God can use
our frustrations for good, if we let Him.
Paul is an
excellent example of this. His missionary
journeys were cut short and his plans to
preach in other regions thwarted by a long
imprisonment. We might wonder, "If God was
in control of circumstances, why did He
permit the fiery Paul to be imprisoned?"
Think of the people he could have
reached'.?
This is
one way to look at it, but God had a better
idea. Paul's disappointment was God's
appointment because in prison Paul had time
for God to reveal more of His word to him.
During those days of disappointment, Paul
penned the "Prison Epistles." thereby
bequeathing a rich legacy in the books of
Ephesians, Philippians, and Colossians.
These three epistles have been a blessing to
multiple millions, infinitely more than Paul
could possibly reach had he been given
another lifetime for missionary activity.
We often
emphasize the statement from Hebrews that
Jesus "endured the cross." But He did more
than endure; He used the cross to bring
about redemption for sinful man.
When God
permits our well laid plans to collapse,
don't go around suffering like a good little
scout. Consider it an opportunity to grow
stronger and do something special for God.
Out of our frustrations, God wants to make
something good.God may have to let us fall
flat on OUR plans before we will accept His
plan. When disappointing circumstances force
a change in our plans consider it a divine
opportunity to do something special for
God.
Second:
RECONGNIZE PEOPLE FOR WHAT THEY
ARE -- PEOPLE
This will
save you great difficulty. Jesus Christ
never expected people to be anymore than
they are. He didn't suffer disappointment at
the hands of men; He knew men's hearts.
He came to
the Jewish nation and presented Himself with
the credentials of the Messiah. But the
religious leaders to show their appreciation
to God -- plotted His death on the cross.
There He poured out His life for His
followers many of whom turned back from
following Him because the way was too
difficult.
The night
before the cross, Peter, one of the inner
three, bitterly spit out the words, "I don't
know the man." If ever there was a time when
the darkness of disappointment would chill
one's soul, it was then. But our Lord was
never disappointment in men; He was a
divine realist. He knew man's capacity, and
never expected people to produce beyond
their capability.
Following
His first miracle, many people believed
Jesus was the Messiah, but this
didn't-impress Jesus. He knew the fickleness
of man's faithfulness:
"Now when
in Jerusalem at Passover time, during the
festivities many believed in Him as they saw
the signs that He gave. but Jesus, on His
side, did not trust Himself to them -- for
He knew them all. He did not need anyone to
tell Him what people were like. He
understood human nature." John 2:22-23
Jesus
never put man on a pedestal. He knew the
marks of sin nature would always be present
in man's actions. He refused to be carried
away by instant belief manifested over His
first miracle. He had a realistic view of
man which prevented disappointment.
Conversely, a realistic view of man will
insulate you against disappointment when
people let you down. It will keep you from
looking for perfection in an imperfect
specimen. Every person is capable of
disappointing you, if you let
them. Don't expect people to be what
they aren't -- perfect: When you finally
realize people are just people, it will make
it easier to avoid condemning them for doing
things that wreck your plans. With a correct
view of man, you will not expect them to do
more than they can do.
(Incidentally, each one of us may bring
disappointment to others. We're not
certainly always the wronged party!)
A
realistic view of man will keep us from
becoming cynical. It will keep us from
giving up on people. Lets face it -people
are all we have to work with; let's not give
up on them. but don't place your confidence
in them either. Our confidence mustrest in God, not the people
God created.
When Paul
came to Troas and didn't find Titus as pre
arranged, he was agitated. "I had no rest
for my spirit ---." (II Cor. 2:13) But Paul
didn't sit around and stew about being stood
up; he forged ahead to Macedonia alone and
found God led him in a continuous stream of
triumphs in Christ.
THIRD:
REMEMBEROURGOAL IN
LIFE. Our goal should be to "walk as He
walked". We need to pattern our life to
conform to Jesus Christ. Hebrews 12:2 says
it like this:
"Fixing
our eyes on Jesus the author and perfector
of faith, who for the joy set before Him
endured the cross, despising the shame, and
has sat down at the right hand of the throne
of God."
Jesus
Christ's goal was to seek and save those
that were lost. A cross lay across the path
toward that goal. But He was not turned
aside from His goal by the suffering and
shame of the cross; He endured the cross
because He had His eyes firmly fixed on the
goal -- eternal redemption. Keeping His eyes
on the goal of redemption did not lessen the
agony involved, but it did enable Him to
keep going until the task was accomplished!
Think
about this for a moment. Keeping our eyes on
our goal will keep us from being paralyzed
by the frustration of disappointment. It
will enable us to see beyond the
circumstances and people to the prize. If
we get our eyes on the disappointing
situations, we will make little progress
toward living our lives as Christ did.
The man
who carries the football has one thing in
mind - to get to the end zone. The lineman
he faces are BIG and TOUGH How many
touchdowns would he score if when he took
the ball he thought, "Those guys really look
mean." Probably not many. The runner takes
the ball, ducks his head, and drives right
into the middle of the line on his way
toward the end zone.
In the
game of life, we face big lineman,
disappointment. Don't become defeated; Jesus
Christ has opened a hole for us to follow
through the line. If we ever hope to keep
from being defeated by disappointment, we'll
have to keep our eye on the goal as we
follow Jesus Christ.
We all
face disappointment. Circumstance cause
disappointments. People disappoint us. Were
it not that God has made a way to escape, we
would all be defeated.
When the
dark clouds of disappointment fill your sky,
apply these simple principles and see how
God will clear away the darkness of
disappointment.
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This publication is intended to be
used as a personal study tool. Please know it is not wise to take
any
man's word for anything, so prove all things for yourself from
the pages of your own
Bible.
The Church of God, Ministries
International 1767 Stumpf Blvd.
Gretna, LA. 70056
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